Journal Entry

Journal
During the course of this module, I have begun questioning, even more deeply than before, just how much of what I think, feel, and believe about myself and my spirituality is actually mine. I am wondering how much of who I am has been shaped by the patriarchy, which infuses nearly all of our social institutions. I do not know at present. The ego self keeps telling me that I am a well-educated woman who has been exposed to new ideas, new images, and a new way of knowing the world and cannot possibly still be a mostly mindless product of the current culture. My soul is not so sure. I still catch myself buying into old ideas about appearance, behaviors, and self-worth. How can this be?
I have begun questioning whether it is possible to be truly authentic given the constant bombardment of patriarchal messages everywhere one turns, and more distressing, how does one know one way or the other? I resonated strongly with the quote from Georgia O’Keeffe in which she questioned her art: “Before I put brush to canvas, I question ‘Is this mine? Is it influenced by some idea I have acquired from some man?’” (p.318). Perhaps it is as simple as deciding that one has changed and is following a personal course separate from the common and accepted one. Still, this seems a possible road to a pleasant self-deception. Am I saying that we should just chuck it all and not worry about continuing the work of re-owning the Goddess and thus ourselves? Most definitely not!
My concern is that unless the Goddess enters into everyday mythology we can never really have a new way of perceiving ourselves. The Goddess must become as common-place, as interwoven, into the fabric of our culture as the male God to shift our culture into a more connected, more relational space.
The very fact that much of the artwork in this book is from the eighties and nineties and even earlier gives my concern some validity: where is the shift to the new iconography? I still do not see the Goddess portrayed in art very often, at least in mainstream culture. Where is she and why is she still not a part of our everyday lives? These are, I think, very crucial question to our survival as a species. I think that before the male iconography can evolve into more cooperative, relational images the Goddess must be omnipresent, in a word, accepted as just as important and valid—and just as common--a symbol as the male partriachial image. Until that happens, I feel that we will be fighting a constant battle with the culture and ourselves. We will grapple with the question of whether we are thinking in an entirely new way or merely being reactive to the male-dominated culture, which leaves us still in its grip!
Another problem that remains is that young women (at least the ones I am meeting) are moving farther away from the Goddess, for the most part. Many of them are still very caught up in looking, dressing, and acting in ways that are pleasing to men. If asked why they wear what they do, etc. they just shrug. They do not think beyond the billboard. The lack of Goddess iconography as a cultural norm is certainly a large part of this relapse back into compliance. I had an interesting conversation with a man in his late forties recently on this subject. He truly believes that as women continue to wear provocative clothing and act sexual they are reclaiming their power. Perhaps, but if they are not thinking past the magazines and pleasing a potential male, are they claiming power or just doing exactly what male culture wants and expects from them? I feel strongly that they are falling into the same old trap of compliance and subjugation—just presented in a more attractive package, one that feeds the ego and pseudo intelligence.
Of course, there are bright spots in our culture. The company that creates Dove products has begun a “Campaign for Real Beauty,” which features actual women of all ages rather than professional models. By promoting all ages, all bodies, and all appearances as beautiful in a mass-media format, they are helping to reimage woman. We, as a culture, are slow to learn and change. I suspect that because we are such a media and information-based society that such campaigns will be the most effective way to integrate images of the Goddess into our culture, but I think it will take some time. I have also spoken with young men, and I am encouraged. They seem to be looking beyond the television and magazine for their ideas of what women are. Perhaps with such widening of the cultural lens, the Goddess can more easily join the male God in shaping our future culture. I hope so. There needs be a shift to a gentler, more inclusive paradigm.
Men need the Goddess for many reasons. First, it is important for them to understand that women are real—flesh and blood with imperfections—not the slick, false images portrayed by the media. That understanding alone may help women stop abusing themselves to fit into unrealistic molds that damage body and soul. Second, men need the Goddess to show them that there is another path to follow—it may show men that they do not all have to embark on the hero’s quest to conquest and thus give them a new identity of what a man is. Perhaps as the mythology surrounding what “manly” behavior evolves and changes, there will be more room for the Goddess to be part of their iconography.
I do not think that this will happen overnight. There is still significant work to be done. I would like to see more exhibitions of Goddess work in mainstream galleries. I have seen some more recent work but the general tone has been one of cartoonish fluffiness. I would like to see some of the strong, moving work become well-known and part of our culture. An encouraging trend I have noticed is that the Earth Mother is becoming part of our iconography albeit mostly through advertisements for “green” products but with our media-driven society this can be viewed as a step in the right direction, at least.
Judy Chicago and Judith Anderson both create work that resonates with strength and beauty. Judy Chicago’s work resonates for me in the sense of joyful power it extrudes. I cannot remain sad or hopeless when looking at her work. She graphically makes the connection between Mother Earth and the survival of the planet. Her work also shows the regenerative strength and beauty of women. She tells the story of women’s pain, women’s experience. I feel powerful when contemplating her images. The images are also so beautifully, freely sexual in a celebratory, exuberant and healthy way; I want to love myself and others in such a way.
Judith Anderson’s work appeals to my love of Gaia. For me, this is the most direct path to my own power and grounding as a woman on this planet. Her work brings tears to my eyes; I am so moved by the images of women intertwined with nature. I particularly appreciate how often the women in Anderson’s work are crones. I feel that there is an urgent need for the Crone to re-emerge as beautiful wisdom in our culture, fixated as we are on youthful (and ignorant) sexiness. We are in need of wisdom now as never before.
Given our culture’s state of existence in adolescence, as it were, we need the Goddess’ wisdom and messages of interconnectedness, relating, and strength to help us move into cosmic adulthood. Until we leave the physicality and selfishness of youth as a culture, it will remain difficult to change the base from which we interact with one another and our planet.
Ideally, our cosmology would take the form of valuing all beings equally. To stop stratifying people, customs, and beings of all kinds would be an excellent start. Without the need to categorize, stereotype, and judge, a more egalitarian society might emerge. We would begin valuing relationships over material possessions. The Earth would truly become viewed as our Mother and care and respect of her would be common-place. Learning would be individualized and revered. All beings would be seen as our teachers and we as students. Would it be perfect? No, of course not; we are human with all the emotions and desires that go along with it, but we could shift our emphasis toward cooperation and relating more often than not. I see a cosmology of respect for all beings-sentient or not, male or female, old or young. Life would once again become sacred.