Journal-Spiritual Responsibility

Journal-Spiritual Responsibility

Spiritual responsibility will differ from woman to woman; there cannot nor should there be one way of manifesting something as momentous and important as how we speak out truth. I can only speak for myself. For me, such responsibility is first accepting that my connection to spirit is intense in nature and important to me. Second, I must accept that my spirit connection is and will appear unique or odd to others. In this second point, according to my natal chart, is where much of my work will need to be done. It is my responsibility to take what I know and see and translate it into word forms that make sense to others; it is my belief that I have done much work in this limitation already but will continue to find tools that facilitate this. Third, it is my responsibility to hold fast to my vision of what spirit is for me and not allow myself to be swayed by fear or the exhortations of others. And fourth, I must continue to keep at bay the nagging voices that tell me that I have nothing of value to share with others. This is a hard one for me.
There are several ways that I cultivate my garden. One of the most obvious rafts is my connection to nature. It is in natural places that I find peace and serenity. I know that I am terribly out of balance if I cannot still the worries and appreciate the sights, smells, and vibrations of the outdoors, such interaction acts as a wonderful barometer for me. Another way that I cultivate my garden is appreciating the truly good friends I have. Their presence is important to my ability to remain centered. I have the sort of friends who will take me to task for not using the tools I have at my disposal. It takes a genuine friend to tell one that one is being a stupid-shit I also nurture my inner-sanctuary through reading and listening to music that takes my soul to beautiful places. There are also movies that serve the same purpose. I recently watched a movie called, Giant Step, which was extraordinary. The movie Baraka is similar in the power and beauty of the images and the ability to touch the soul. Responsibility comes into play here as it is our job to filter what comes into our realties as much as we can.
These nurturing actions are all simple in theory but sometimes difficult to execute. One of the main impediments to living more often and more fully in my garden is time. It seems that there are so many things the “need doing” all the time. Still, this is where the responsibility comes into play; I simply need to organize and make time. Money is often impedance—there is never enough of that either. Still, this too is an excuse; there is always a way.
I have come to realize that one of my biggest distractions to cultivating my garden is my preoccupation with intimate relationships or more accurately—my lack of one. It is rather embarrassing to admit that such a matter is causing me to be distracted from my path given what we are studying! However, after reading my natal chart and the discussion attached to it, I realize that my intensity is not limited to my spirit-connection but trickles out to most areas of my life. Why am I so surprised that my need for companionship and physical touch is equally intense? It is in looking at these different aspects that it becomes apparent that spiritual maturity and responsibility is as much about being honest about my own nature as it is about manifesting what I know outwardly to help others.
In connection with the intensity and need for a relationship there is the responsibility of deciding exactly how I want such intimacy to occur and what the parameters will be. Too often in the past, I have allowed the male partner to define the relationship, with sometimes—no—often disastrous and damaging results to me. Allowing such disrespect is the same as handing over one’s power and taking NO responsibility at all. In accordance with the readings, I have begun the process of reclaiming myself, my power, and resacrilizing my body and sexuality. I believe that this is a matter of responsibility that many women, even today, do not embrace, not fully at any rate. We have not come nearly as far as we would like to think. It is vital that women begin to take responsibility and be aware of the messages that they are being sold in this culture. It is time to re-own ourselves in all the myriad aspects of being woman.